Grown-Up Me

Wow. Talk about taking a break. Ok, I’ll admit it wasn’t intentional. But I must say time is moving so quickly these days, I’m struggling just to keep up!

Considering my last post, however, I think I’m doing ok. And by “ok” I mean I’m extremely overwhelmed, overworked, and completely exhausted. But I actually love it! And I have a good reason why.

To catch you up, I recently made the decision to recommit to my job. (I know that sounds crazy, but sometimes we all need a little bit of a renewal, am I right?) And it’s been one of my best moves this year. Usually, I’m distracted by what’s coming next, or what I can do concurrently. But finally, I’m primarily focused and present. Yes, I’m super busy. And yes, I’m super tired. But I’m also feeling this weird new sense of concern for what I’m doing. Maybe this is what working passionately feels like…

Anyway, recommitting to work has also meant rethinking some of the things I hoped to accomplish this year. And not to say they won’t happen, but to consider that they may happen in the way I hadn’t originally planned.

For instance, I started this year (and ended last year) fully set on taking my “on-the-side” business to new heights. I partnered with a friend, we came up with a name, and we even went as far as starting a website and dreaming about office space. Fast forward to a month or two ago, and we had to pump the breaks. We both recognized just how unique the opportunities of our full-time jobs were, and decided to focus our efforts there instead. We took on a small number of clients that we could handle, and we haven’t looked back since. Another great move.

But this is also where detachment comes in. It’s hard to avoid the feeling of being a failure when you’re so attached to the outcome of any particular thing. So maintaining perspective, I realize I’m still getting paid to do what I love – on the side. Maybe it’s not from my very own incredibly chic office space downtown, but it is still happening. And that’s a little win worth taking.

The next thing about this recommitment is acknowledging the long term affects of my current actions and decisions. A good friend once told me that this way of thinking is actually one of the clearest signs of maturity. When we can see beyond just today, and actually visualize how our everyday choices will impact our lives five, ten, or twenty years down the line, we’re on to something great.

So this new attitude has given me the extra push to get a handle on my finances, my debt, my health, my career, my educational aspirations, and even (gasp!) my possibility of having kids in the kind of, sort of near future.

Long story short, I may be growing up. But it’s not too scary. Sure it means early mornings and late evenings doing things I have to do, and sure it means missing events or being even less social than usual, but it’s also turning out to mean more fulfillment and pride in who I’m becoming as an adult.

I know this was a bit of a status update, but I’d still love to hear about your progress and adventures “growing up.” Let me know in the comments below!

TTYS, b

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